What are you talking yourself out of?

We all have dreams.

Sometimes, they pan out. We go to college and study amazing things like film and creative writing. We travel the world and see places that we’ve dreamed about our whole lives. We buy a house and fill it with reminders of our dreams, and then proceed to list a hundred reasons why we can’t go after these dreams. Not sure what I mean? Here’s some classic examples:

1. “I can’t afford it”. Why can’t you afford to be happy and spend all day working on things you are passionate about? Is it because that shiny car in the driveway is chewing up your disposable income? Is it because society told you that working in a shitty beige cubicle is the thing to do, because everyone does it? Is it because you’ve maxed out your credit cards spending money on things like food, alcohol, entertainment and throw-away items to distract yourself from the growing resentment you are feeling towards your life?
2. “I’m not good enough”. This one is especially popular for the female population. We can all be guilty of focusing on our shortfalls instead of highlighting our strengths. We are fantastic at talking ourselves out of our dreams. Its scary to stop being a cubicle zombie to pursue something that we really care about, because what if we fail? Or even worse, what if we ditch everything to follow this dream and then decide we don’t want it any more?
3. “I don’t have time”. Yes, you do. I do, we all do. Think about this: Unless someone discovers the secret to immortality, nobody reading this is going to see the next century. We’ll be gone. Our time to live is so short. What do you want to do with that short amount of time? Do you want to be Cubicle Zombie who drinks and eats too much, lazes around and watches re-runs of The Simpsons instead of chasing your dreams?
4. “I don’t know where to start”. This is a legitimate concern, and it is OK to feel this way, as long as you come up with a way of solving this problem before you’re in the nursing home. Dreams can be overwhelming, because they are more than just a statement of “I want to do this”. Dreams are felt as much as thought, and they can be all over the place. The trick is to start, because starting is the hardest part. Baby steps make the journey easier – take a course, draw a mind-map, read a book, write a business plan. Do something. Do anything.
5. “It’s all too hard”. Well, it is if you say so. If you really want to achieve your dreams, stop saying this! Reality is just perception. Overcome this belief and anything is possible.

All too often I speak to people who are letting fear stop them from making the leap to achieving their dreams. Like a friend who is all set up to be a photographer. She has the equipment, the skills and the savvy, but doesnt have the confidence to break out of her 9-5 and pursue her passion full-time. She’s effectively talked herself out of it by thinking of all the reasons her plan won’t work, instead of focusing on all the fabulous reasons it will succeed.

I’m another classic example. When I think of all the distractions I create to avoid thinking about my dreams, it makes me mad. TV. Social outings that I don’t really care to attend. Food. Alcohol. Hours surfing the net aimessly. Did I mention TV? I mean, those Winchester boys are delicious, but I have got to turn Supernatural off and get to work on what really matters – my life. Not some made up show that serves as a distraction from my current work situation.And that means focusing on the things that matter – my writing, my business, my relationship.

So, dear readers, this post is just as much for me as it is for you. Today, I’m committing to a new strategy. No TV. No alcohol. Saying no to social gatherings that I’d just as soon miss. The internets – I love you, but we need some time apart. It’s time to stop talking and start doing.

What about you?